BROKEN BONES:
Circumstances of MAGIC
There is degree of dependability for the injured, the
handicapped and the crippled, but there is varying degrees of taking advantage
of the goodness in others and being able to actually manage more than one
realizes if one is strong, healthy and a survivor in mind and spirit.
This opportunity I have right now with a broken leg
puts me, so to speak, in Scotts (random name) of the world, whom is my upstairs
handicapped roommate and takes advantage of the home health care or his
biological mother or his stepfather whom he deplores. I have seen so many
helpers quit in the last few months.
This opportunity helps me to see through the eyes of
the less fortunate and those who have given up to life’s struggles, becoming
numb to other’s burdens, jobs and feelings and may have had something happen to
them where they subscribe and believe it’s the end of the world. I don’t buy into that.
It also helps me see through the eyes of ‘The Help’
and see that last straw that breaks the camels back—one more question, one more
need, one more want—can you do this for me or can you do that for me? —That
takes it over that imaginary line and the person being helped becomes a burden
to the helper. The helper grows weary of being taken advantaged of and they
walk out that door forever shutting that door on the Scotts of their life.
They might continue doing home health care for the
elderly, but they won’t break again in the same place because they told
themselves they won’t be pushed that way and that far again kind of like a
broken bone.
No. Life isn’t easy. The tables can be turned in a
split second of not landing the skis properly and sharp pain shoots an electric
shock through that broken bone. Sure, I could’ve done that run a hundred times
and been fine, but life in its vigor is just as fragile and if not more so,
around the edges of vitality, youth and health.
From that moment on, my life was forever changed and
never will be the same. It will make me stronger and more honest, building
aspects of character I didn’t know I could muster. I am different than the day
before my accident. What felt lonely and empty inside me before now is
overflowing to the brim with goodness from others and the light that overpowers
darkness. I am lucky! I am grateful for family, friends, co-workers, humanity
and life with all of its twists and turns and breaks and mends. Its beauty
makes its sadness worth living. Life is mysterious and I welcome its Magic.
Sure, my left leg throbs in places it never has
before and is swollen unrecognizably in comparison to my other healthy leg.
But, I’ve never broken anything besides my nose and heart on a couple of
occasions. There is beauty in that pain—a deep profound feeling focused within
that leg and my body that didn’t exist before proving that I’m alive and
present.
Sure, I could sell out and tell myself and others
lies that I believe and say ‘it’s the end’ and victimize myself with a “poor
me” attitude, but that wont get me anywhere except in deep dark valley of
depression with no way out.
Yeah, I broke my fibula and dislocated my left ankle but these are still first world problems. I have enough to eat, a
job, a bed to sleep in, a shelter over my head, friends, family, clean water,
electricity, good hospitals, etc. I’ll be fine. There is not a war raging and battling outside
my door. The church and the government are not burning whole libraries of books
and gathering all the free thinkers to be locked up. It’s just a broken bone
and nothing more.
It’s a chance to slow down for four weeks and maybe
more from our fast-paced and crazed world that is so intoxicated and blinded by
wealth, greed, progress and production that we fail to slow down to smell the
flowers in summer or watch the snow flakes fall in a hushed winter setting or
listen to the news the song birds bring with the coming of spring.
This opportunity forces me to slow down and see life
as it is, not muddied by my own selfish projection of ‘what if’ but raw, broken
and full at the same time. Things take longer and are more challenging, but
that’s it.
We are pretty fortunate to be alive. It’s an honor
and a blessing. Sure, plans have changed and now I can’t go on that 30-40 mile
backcountry cross country skiing trip I had planned in Glacier National Park in
a few weeks and my other upcoming ski date with a hottie may not happen or be
prolonged a few weeks. It did happen last night and we went on a date.
It’s not about what happens to us but how we respond
and adapt to the constant changing universe that we are apart of. Most of our
problems arise from too much doing and not enough being. We are human beings
not human doings.
When life gets juicy with plot, complications arise
and mystery is close. Ride the wave of acceptance that vibration will carry you
to new levels. The doors of perception will be cleansed and open if your heart
is in the right place and things can and will happen, as you lay vulnerable to
life and its elements—MAGIC is waiting for us to slow down enough to experience
her.
