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Thursday, February 27, 2014

Broken Bones: Circumstances of Magic


BROKEN BONES: Circumstances of MAGIC
There is degree of dependability for the injured, the handicapped and the crippled, but there is varying degrees of taking advantage of the goodness in others and being able to actually manage more than one realizes if one is strong, healthy and a survivor in mind and spirit.
This opportunity I have right now with a broken leg puts me, so to speak, in Scotts (random name) of the world, whom is my upstairs handicapped roommate and takes advantage of the home health care or his biological mother or his stepfather whom he deplores. I have seen so many helpers quit in the last few months.
This opportunity helps me to see through the eyes of the less fortunate and those who have given up to life’s struggles, becoming numb to other’s burdens, jobs and feelings and may have had something happen to them where they subscribe and believe it’s the end of the world.  I don’t buy into that.
It also helps me see through the eyes of ‘The Help’ and see that last straw that breaks the camels back—one more question, one more need, one more want—can you do this for me or can you do that for me? —That takes it over that imaginary line and the person being helped becomes a burden to the helper. The helper grows weary of being taken advantaged of and they walk out that door forever shutting that door on the Scotts of their life.
They might continue doing home health care for the elderly, but they won’t break again in the same place because they told themselves they won’t be pushed that way and that far again kind of like a broken bone.
No. Life isn’t easy. The tables can be turned in a split second of not landing the skis properly and sharp pain shoots an electric shock through that broken bone. Sure, I could’ve done that run a hundred times and been fine, but life in its vigor is just as fragile and if not more so, around the edges of vitality, youth and health.
From that moment on, my life was forever changed and never will be the same. It will make me stronger and more honest, building aspects of character I didn’t know I could muster. I am different than the day before my accident. What felt lonely and empty inside me before now is overflowing to the brim with goodness from others and the light that overpowers darkness. I am lucky! I am grateful for family, friends, co-workers, humanity and life with all of its twists and turns and breaks and mends. Its beauty makes its sadness worth living. Life is mysterious and I welcome its Magic.
Sure, my left leg throbs in places it never has before and is swollen unrecognizably in comparison to my other healthy leg. But, I’ve never broken anything besides my nose and heart on a couple of occasions. There is beauty in that pain—a deep profound feeling focused within that leg and my body that didn’t exist before proving that I’m alive and present.
Sure, I could sell out and tell myself and others lies that I believe and say ‘it’s the end’ and victimize myself with a “poor me” attitude, but that wont get me anywhere except in deep dark valley of depression with no way out.
Yeah, I broke my fibula and dislocated my left ankle but these are still first world problems. I have enough to eat, a job, a bed to sleep in, a shelter over my head, friends, family, clean water, electricity, good hospitals, etc.  I’ll be fine. There is not a war raging and battling outside my door. The church and the government are not burning whole libraries of books and gathering all the free thinkers to be locked up. It’s just a broken bone and nothing more.
It’s a chance to slow down for four weeks and maybe more from our fast-paced and crazed world that is so intoxicated and blinded by wealth, greed, progress and production that we fail to slow down to smell the flowers in summer or watch the snow flakes fall in a hushed winter setting or listen to the news the song birds bring with the coming of spring.
This opportunity forces me to slow down and see life as it is, not muddied by my own selfish projection of ‘what if’ but raw, broken and full at the same time. Things take longer and are more challenging, but that’s it.
We are pretty fortunate to be alive. It’s an honor and a blessing. Sure, plans have changed and now I can’t go on that 30-40 mile backcountry cross country skiing trip I had planned in Glacier National Park in a few weeks and my other upcoming ski date with a hottie may not happen or be prolonged a few weeks. It did happen last night and we went on a date.
It’s not about what happens to us but how we respond and adapt to the constant changing universe that we are apart of. Most of our problems arise from too much doing and not enough being. We are human beings not human doings.
When life gets juicy with plot, complications arise and mystery is close. Ride the wave of acceptance that vibration will carry you to new levels. The doors of perception will be cleansed and open if your heart is in the right place and things can and will happen, as you lay vulnerable to life and its elements—MAGIC is waiting for us to slow down enough to experience her.

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